Coffee Talk Time

Coffee talk is a little different starting NOW!  Instead of answering questions each week, I’m just going to chat about what’s going on in this crazy, confused and in my opinion gloriously interesting mind of mine.  Just imagine we are sitting at a little café with a hot cup of our favorite blend in our hand.  That would be truly amazing for me because my life is crazy right now.

So, my job title changed e a few weeks ago from Financial Analyst: Corporate Brands to Financial and Sales Analyst: ALL BRANDS.  My responsibilities basically tripled overnight and I’m having a love hate relationship with it.  I love that I am busy because my days fly by, but I hate that I am constantly slammed and everything is a fire drill.  I’m scared about making mistakes and I hate that feeling.  Thank heavens I am not above owning up to my mistakes and making them correct; it’s rare this day and age.  A few higher ups are all about placing blame, pointing fingers and finding errors.  Sooo irritating!  We are all a team here people.  Let’s work together and not function in an environment of fear.  Now, I’m just waiting for the salary increase to kick in because I deserve it.  I rarely think that I deserve something, but in this case, I have worked my butt off and feel extremely underpaid at times, so bring on the pay raise.  My bosses are amazing, so I really can't complain, but heck, it's coffee talk i.e. girl talk and this is what consumes my thoughts because it consumes my day.  I am really much happier with the change because I need change and continuous challenge at work.  If I don't have it, I get bored and that's never a good thing.  

Being stressed and super busy at work is tiring, but I can’t stop once work is done.  I have to be a mama and a wife when I get home.  Hubby is still laid up, so the morning routine, lunch making, dinner making and clean-up, house work, etc. are all my responsibility. 

Feelings of shame and guilt have been consuming my body.  Oh Lord, they are not fun.  I am fighting them away and trying to be true to myself, open to criticism, excited about life, but sometimes they just creep in and rock my world.  Sunday night for example…I finally got everything done for the week, got into bed, opened my work email, saw that there was an issue with a report I did that was resolved and proceeded to bawl my eyes out.  I don’t mean a sniffle.  I sobbed and sobbed and sobbed.  I must have fallen asleep because I woke up with puffy, crusty, nasty eyes and the first thing someone told me at work was “You look exhausted.”  Breathe in, breathe out, smile…

The answer to all my problems is that I MUST DANCE MORE!  Speaking of dance, I have my Waltz and triple Swing entrances choreographed for my March competition!  Oh I am in love!!  Thank you Taras and Lynn for entrances!  I promise to make you proud!

On a SUPER HAPPY note, my friend had her baby!!!! (The friend I took maternity pictures of.)  I am so beyond happy and in love with her little bundle of joy!  He was born this past week and weighs 8 lbs 12 oz.  Oh my heavens, Calvin is simply perfect!  I could stare at him and touch his soft skin all day long.  He is so healthy and strong and just screams BOY!! My heart is happy!   I love babies!!  He is very lucky to have such wonderful parents!  Congratulations new parents!!

Happy Valentine’s Day!  I hope you feel loved!!  I will be staying in with my patient.  On a side note, I could NEVER be a nurse.  It is not my calling, but I am truly thankful for all the nurses out there!  Thank you for doing what you do.  Your job isn’t always glorious, but I hope it’s rewarding!

Much love.