Fine is not a feeling.
I heard that this weekend. I'm blanking as to where I heard it, but it got me thinking. Fine isn't a feeling. It's what people say I say when I don't want to expose my true feelings. It's the scapegoat of feelings.
Don't get me wrong. I fully support people keeping their feelings to themselves and saying "I'm FINE," but I do believe that it means
I don't want to tell you how I'm feeling
or I'm hiding something
or I hurt badly
or Why the heck do you care?
or I'm working on it...got it under control
or I'm embarrassed to say the truth.
Regardless of the reason, fine isn't a feeling in my opinion.
I say it a lot.
And I generally say it when I don't want to talk...which is frequent.
I like to handle things on my own, in my own time, according to my rules.
This causes issues in relationships, but it's how I am. If I feel forced into making a decision I am not sure about, it gets ugly inside me. I am a worrier. Period.
The more I worry, the tenser I get, the more I retreat inside myself, the more I cry.
Crying helps though.
Wow. That was a tangent.
Here is a pretty sky picture to lighten the mood.
I love the sky. Like totally LOVE.
Friday evening.
Saturday evening.
Mother Nature delivered once again. Love her!
Much love.
So true! I'm a worrier as well. It's like a disease. However, I'm not a crier. Interesting how different everyone is with expressing feelings. I guess the key to relationships is understanding how people express their feelings. Knowing that "I'm fine" means give me space for one person, I'm tired for another, etc.
ReplyDeleteWorrying is like a disease. Everyone is different for sure and I am 100% a crier, but generally when I am alone. I don't like to cry on someone's shoulder. I like to cry alone. It is definitely key in relationships to understand what someone means by "I'm fine." It could mean "I need you." Everyone is different.
DeleteI say fine when people ask me how my day at work was. I say fine when I really do not know why I am in a bad mood. You are totally right by saying its a way to avoid talking. But a lot of times for me its a way to stop myself from complaining about life. Really my life is amazing and great and I am so thankful, so when I am feeling sorry for myself I am fine. Lol does that make any sense?
ReplyDeleteThat makes perfect sense. I say fine when explaining my day as well. Fine is a word I say when I don't want to talk and it means different things for everyone.
DeleteI love my life as well...even the hard parts.
I'll usually say fine when I know I'm being irrational due to my femininity (hey, we all know it happens) and I want to convey that yes, I AM upset, but no, I DON'T want to talk about it. I know that if I was being more rational it wouldn't be such a big deal, so why make it a big deal right then? I sometimes try to change the subject and lighten up a little, so an awkward silent treatment-esque period doesn't follow.
ReplyDelete